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I think for me personally, I see social media (in the negative sense) as platforms that care mostly about engagement and use algorithms to drive that engagement, especially those that curate content for each user. In that regard Reddit would be social media, though since I rarely engage with it I see it more as a website. To me Discord isn't social media so much as a feature-laden chatroom, as nothing is curated beyond our own manual attempts to emphasize certain channels.

It's probably not a difference that realistically matters...Discord can be just as unhealthy as Facebook depending on other factors, but that's how I personally sense it.