Chapter 1 has been reworked a bit as well. In the dream, it's mainly just been rewritten a bit, though carries the same tone as the earlier draft. Michael's section is also the same, though there have been some wording/grammatical changes.
The big change is the Commandant's section, which has been altered completely since the character, as well as the end of the prologue, have both been changed.
Tales of Travinika Book 1 - Chapter 1
“Where am I?” A voice called out in the endless darkness. There was no response to the voice as it called out again. “Hello?” It called, as the darkness began to part like a thick fog.
The parting darkness revealed what appeared to be a broken looking road leading seemingly nowhere in a cover of darkness with only moonlight as its light. On each side of the road stood black, lifeless, and twisted black trees that lacked any leaves on their branches. Walking along the path was a boy no older than sixteen with short brown hair and piercing blue eyes. He seemed unsure of his surroundings as his eyes continuously looked around with each step that he took.
He continued to call out to the darkness in hopes of an answer, but was only met with the unusual echo of his voice along the road. Looking both ways, the boy seemed unsure of what was going on as he continued to walk, realizing slowly that the road was not going to change for him anytime soon.
“Michael...where are you going?” a voice called out, as the boy stopped. The boy called Michael turned and called back out to the new voice that was speaking to him, but was once again met with the same echo of his own voice in response. “Where are you going, Michael?” The voice called out again, as Michael attempted to find the source of the voice, but to no avail.
As he turned around to look, he felt himself bump into something as he quickly turned. There was nothing there, but in the distance he could see a girl standing there with her head down...her hair covering her face. She looked up slightly as a set of glowing red eyes seemed to pierce through the darkness covering her face. “Lexi?” Michael called out, as he ran up to the girl...only for her to disappear once he made it to her.
Michael looked around more, as he suddenly turned around as if he sensed something. Standing behind him was a tall figure clad in a dull, but exquisitely designed silver armor, their features completely hidden behind a helmet and blanket of darkness. However, this figure had the same glowing red eyes that pierced through the darkness. “So...it’s you then. This should be entertaining.” the figure called out in a multiple set of voices. The figure laughed as the scene disappeared within mere seconds, including the figure themselves.
~Michael woke up with a start as he sat up abruptly in his bed. It was the same dream once more...but this time it had a new wrinkle to it with the mysterious figure. What did they mean when they said it was him? What would be entertaining?
The blaring sound of his alarm clock snapped Michael back into reality as he groaned at the sound of the blaring clock, turned it off, and then put his head under his pillow in an attempt to go back to sleep.
A knock appeared at his door as it then opened as abruptly as the alarm. “Michael, it’s time to get up!” a woman called out as Michael groaned and continued to try to get back to sleep. His mother put her palm to her face and sighed at her son’s reaction as she flipped the light switch on. “Up, now.” She called out as she walked away from the room and headed downstairs.
Michael let out one last groan as he took the pillow off of his face and slowly sat up once more. In an equally slow motion he grudgingly picked out a set of clothes for the day and made his way to the bathroom. Reaching one hand out, Michael twisted the doorknob, and—in his dazed state—expected it would open as he walked right into the door. The sound of a little girl humming happily rang through the door as Michael leaned against it and pounded slowly. “Lexi, hurry up. I need to get ready for school!” Michael sighed out as the sound of the humming was replaced by the sing-song response of “aaalmost dooone!”
Michael leaned against the wall as he waited for his sister to hurry up. She was only 10, and it was the first day of school. She was still at the age where she enjoyed school, so the first day was likg going to the theme park for her.
As the door opened, Lexi skipped out as her pigtails danced along with each step. “All done!” she said happily as she made her way downstairs to the living room. Michael unglued himself from the wall with a look of disdain as he made his way into the bathroom and slammed the door.
~Soldiers clad in silver and blue armor parted like the red see when another made his way into the castle halls. Unlike the others, his armor had more extravagant designs to indicate that he was of a higher rank. He also lacked a helmet unlike the others, allowing his jet black hair to move freely as he walked. His fierce emerald green eyes stared forward as he walked with no signs of wandering—this was a man on a mission.
As he made his way up the red carpeted stairs toward the throne room, the soldiers who remained quiet began to whisper to each other. As he was the leader of the king’s army, it was normal that he would be called to sit in while the king had an audience with others...but it was unusual for him to be summoned for an audience himself.
The lights in the extravagant throne room sparkled like diamonds. As the Commandant made his way inside, he stopped in the center of the room and knelt down in front of a beautiful silver and red throne. Sitting in the throne was a powerful looking middle aged man with a full auburn beard and draped in royal attire.
“Rise, Roz.” the king commanded in a deep, but somehow gentle voice. Roz obeyed as he stood at attention, refusing to let any side of informality appear in front of the king. His face remained impassive despite the pleasant look on the king’s face at the sight of him.
“I wish the reason for my summons was on a more pleasant note, Commandant.” The king started, as he looked toward one of the other soldiers in the room and nodded. The soldier nodded in response and left the room, as the king’s face turned toward the Commandant. “I assume you’ve heard of the city of Alethia.” he stated simply as the Commandant thought to himself for a moment. “I believe so, yes. It’s a city that floats above us, which I believe right now it’s near our very city.” “You’re mostly correct on that one, but apparently there’s been a modification to that statement.” the king responded.
On that note, the soldier returned with another, each holding up a wounded soldier with pure white wings. Roz seemed taken back by this sight, as he looked back towards the king. “I know this is difficult soldier, but please repeat what you’ve told me.” The king commanded as the wounded soldier looked up slowly and began to speak.
“It happened so suddenly...our elders were slaughtered during our ceremony, and our jewel was taken from us. When I went to find help for a commotion that was happening, everyone was gone.” the soldier started as Roz seemed a bit confused. “What, you mean they left the city?” he asked, as the soldier continued. “That’s what I thought at first, but even the temple was suddenly empty. It’s like everyone just vanished into thin air. I started to leave to warn everyone...but I was attacked.” The soldier said as he clutched his wound in pain. “Did you see who it was?” Roz asked, as the soldier regained himself for a moment. “No, sir. They were covered in a veil of darkness, and left me to die.”
“Do you know what this means, Roz?” the king asked as Roz turned back toward him. “I’m unsure, my liege. My knowledge of Alethia is vague at best.” he responded, as the king looked towards the soldiers and nodded once more as they took the wounded Alethian away. He then turned his face toward another figure in the room, this one clothed in scientific garb. “Where is the city now?” he asked, as the scientist looked at his clipboard. “Well, if my calculations are correct, it should be hovering near Celan at the moment.” he replied, as the king turned his gaze back toward the Commandant.
“Commandant, it is vital that you get your men over to Celan and have them evacuate the area immediately.” the king ordered, as Commandant Grif saluted. “Of course my liege, but may I ask why?” “Because Grif, without that jewel of theirs, Alethia will fall, and Celan will become nothing more than a distant memory.”