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You could also just do what I'm doing, that is, stay in school as long as possible until most of the baby boomers are either dead or retired, then swoop in and basically get the job you want

I'm even thinking about going up to the LL.D. for no other reason than to call myself a doctor and disappoint everyone when they'll find out I can't prescribe shit.

I commit to lose weight so that by the time I get new glasses next year I can pass as a girl and get cat eye frames.

If I may make a suggestion...maybe it's time to look and see what alternative careers you could pursue. Try to be prepared in case the worst pans out. What's been going on with your job is shit, but I get the idea that most jobs are like that...=/

I believe my plan will be to finish paying off my loans here, save up some money, and move on to better options.


The best answer is a personality conflict between my boss and myself.

I mean didn't things go ok up until this point?  I'm honestly curious as to what happened because I'm worried

You could also just do what I'm doing, that is, stay in school as long as possible until most of the baby boomers are either dead or retired, then swoop in and basically get the job you want

Huh. What an interesting strategy. But that means tons of student debt, does it not? I'd rather not be crushed with loan payments for the first half of my adult life...

I need some advice, my computer is fucked, but it has been implied that I'm getting a new one for Christmas. But it needs to last me till then, so, here's the question. How do you factory reset a HP Pavilion dv7 6000 series laptop?

How is it fucked? A factory reset may not be what you want...

You could also just do what I'm doing, that is, stay in school as long as possible until most of the baby boomers are either dead or retired, then swoop in and basically get the job you want

Huh. What an interesting strategy. But that means tons of student debt, does it not? I'd rather not be crushed with loan payments for the first half of my adult life...

I had a full scholarship for my bachelors, have a full scholarship for my masters and perhaps if I go there I'll have a full scholarship for my doctorate too.

If not...it's no big deal

I'm watching this super depressing show and I don't know what is worse : that it is super depressing or that I watch it precisely because it is.

I was going through some old files on my computer and happened to find a AIM conversation with a girl I was involved with...the last conversation we had. Something had happened the last time we talked...I don't remember what, but in the end we decided that we should go our separate ways. At the end she said she would most likely never talk to me again, and she was right.

The file is dated April 24, 2005.

I had just turned 19 the month before, and things were changing fast. Whereas before I had been involved with only girls, she would be the last one I'd be involved with for eight years. I would only now begin exploring my feelings for guys, although I had realized I was into them two years before this, and for years I'd exclusively be into guys, to the point that I eventually decided I was gay...or at least only theoretically bi...for a long time. At the time we had that conversation, I remember being sure it was for the best for both of us, and she seemed sure too.

But looking back, I just feel regret, for letting a friendship slip away for no good reason if nothing else. It's not like either of us had done anything to warrant not talking to each other. And who knows what might have been? I remember her as a fun, spunky, creative person...had a unique quirky personality that made me smile...one of the things I liked about her. But she was just a good friend, and was supportive of me exploring my sexuality after we were no longer involved. So why did it up the way it did? It didn't really have to be that way, did it?

I've always been someone that's dwelled in the past a lot, although not as much now as I used to be. Sometimes I think of people I knew and talked to years ago and wonder if they ever think of me too. If they ever think of the times we had and smile, or if it's all been long-forgotten and I'm the only person that remembers and reminisces about these things.

It reminds me of a wallpaper I found in the same old files, that I apparently saved in 2006: Remember the paths that once crossed...

I was going through some old files on my computer and happened to find a AIM conversation with a girl I was involved with...the last conversation we had. Something had happened the last time we talked...I don't remember what, but in the end we decided that we should go our separate ways. At the end she said she would most likely never talk to me again, and she was right.

The file is dated April 24, 2005.

I had just turned 19 the month before, and things were changing fast. Whereas before I had been involved with only girls, she would be the last one I'd be involved with for eight years. I would only now begin exploring my feelings for guys, although I had realized I was into them two years before this, and for years I'd exclusively be into guys, to the point that I eventually decided I was gay...or at least only theoretically bi...for a long time. At the time we had that conversation, I remember being sure it was for the best for both of us, and she seemed sure too.

But looking back, I just feel regret, for letting a friendship slip away for no good reason if nothing else. It's not like either of us had done anything to warrant not talking to each other. And who knows what might have been? I remember her as a fun, spunky, creative person...had a unique quirky personality that made me smile...one of the things I liked about her. But she was just a good friend, and was supportive of me exploring my sexuality after we were no longer involved. So why did it up the way it did? It didn't really have to be that way, did it?

I've always been someone that's dwelled in the past a lot, although not as much now as I used to be. Sometimes I think of people I knew and talked to years ago and wonder if they ever think of me too. If they ever think of the times we had and smile, or if it's all been long-forgotten and I'm the only person that remembers and reminisces about these things.

It reminds me of a wallpaper I found in the same old files, that I apparently saved in 2006: Remember the paths that once crossed...

Try talking to her?

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I doubt any of her contact information from nine years ago is still valid. The most I could do is try searching for her on Facebook and trying to contact her there, but you of all people should know how people feel when you do that.

I'm the exact same way. I dwell on the past a lot, I remember my life in the past and wonder if everyone's forgotten about these times I've shared with others. The twist with me is that I get salty because none of these things happen anymore, none of these nice memories are in the present. I never got how people draw happiness from nice memories, I just feel bad because they're over and done.

I also know every single thing I've done wrong in my life, the bad choices I've made and the actions I should have taken because I can't stop analyzing my past behaviour. It's some compulsive stuff.

It's been very beneficial for my sanity to leave the past where it belongs. I can't stop my stupid mind from making me feel like shit by pointing out all I've ever failed at or done badly but at least I can stop enabling it. That's why I have a strict "no contact" policy with my exes. There have been times where I've failed to uphold this policy and each and every time I've felt like a turd. I've been as far as sleeping with one - that's trouble, never will again. Even speaking about mundane shit with an ex is a trigger to me, because then I get salty I'm not a part of it and my downward spiral towards "here's everything you did that might have caused the break up" mode starts anew. Maintaining contact for me is enabling it and then I can't stop thinking about what could've happened if I didn't do x or y or what could've been were we still together and all that crap. Thoughts like that aren't productive. It's over, always will be. Since I know I tend to ruminate the past, I try to busy myself in the present, read, study, watch TV, play vidya, meet new people, anything to keep me from falling in the hole.

At least at a "natural" state I can always block them, but my tendancy to look to the past is so strong when holding on to past artefacts that it literally ruins my day because I can't do anything else. At least, the benefit of my behaviour is that I never do the same mistake twice - I just do other ones

My tip to you is just to forget about it, because if you're anything like me, getting in contact with her will derail your train.

Oh I don't intend to contact her. There's a point where you have to realize there's no going back, and for that circumstance it was nine years ago. It's more feeling like it could have been handled better...but, I was much younger then and it's hard to keep up a friendship after a relationship anyways. I'm probably not giving myself enough credit...it's just weird thinking back at the people you used to be close to, and then realizing it's been years since you even talked to them.

For me, dwelling in the past is a double-edged sword...it can make me feel bad, but it can make me appreciate the present too. Maybe it's just a human tendency to long for the way things used to be in some regard...

Oh I don't intend to contact her. There's a point where you have to realize there's no going back, and for that circumstance it was nine years ago. It's more feeling like it could have been handled better...but, I was much younger then and it's hard to keep up a friendship after a relationship anyways. I'm probably not giving myself enough credit...it's just weird thinking back at the people you used to be close to, and then realizing it's been years since you even talked to them.

For me, dwelling in the past is a double-edged sword...it can make me feel bad, but it can make me appreciate the present too. Maybe it's just a human tendency to long for the way things used to be in some regard...

My dad gave me some advice a long time ago that I hold dear. He told me that friends will come and go as you move throughout your life. I surmise that I have had better friendships since taking in that part of wisdom. I enjoy the friendships I have while I have them. I have definitely drifted away from many people in my life. There is a desire to keep that core group of friends, but it is realistically impossible. The friends I have now are the longest set of friends I've ever had, close to 9 years now. Some have come and gone. I have hated some and rekindled the friendships. But yeah...it is strange how much we value each friendship and it seems they drift away with time. The longest term friend I have is actually an online friend from Missouri that I've known for close to 15 years I believe.   

I once read that the average friendship lasts five years, but I've noticed on average mine lasts more like one or two. The oldest friendship with anyone that I still talk to regularly is probably Daylen and another person I started talking to more regularly about the same time...about three years. If I count people I talk to only every few months or so then I get eight years, but...I'm not sure I can call that friendship.

I get the feeling I'm particularly abrasive on people I'm close with.

I'm blessed to have a very solid set of friends with whom I have never fought, 10-11 years now. I usually keep my friends for a very long time, even those I've lost were long friendships.

My problem is usually relationships. After a year and a half, there's always something that makes them go to shit. I crave stability, which is why I usually try to fix what's wrong, but it never seems like the girls I'm with care much.

I've always thought my golden years would be in my 30s and 40s when women want a stable life too (plus I'm gonna be fucking hot with a few wrinkles and a more weathered face). IDK, to me, the girls of my generation (not all of them of course, but enough) are all YOLO and shit, which I despise and doesn't lead to the stability I demand. Hell...I'd be ready to found a family right now.