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Guys, meet Reon and his life.

Yes, unfortunately guys that is genuinely real life... Though I do wish it was RP because I probably shouldn't run for the next like week and I love running...

So, other than having to cough up and blow out a lot of gunk in the mornings, I'm pretty much recovered from my illness.

Hooray! Hope you make a full recovery soon.

Sent from my KFSOWI using Tapatalk

What's on my mind?

Contemplating retirement. People have taken the fun out of this game for me, and seem to be determined to force me out one way or another and have made plenty of things personal lately. It's either gameplay or I am a very nasty person who deserves it.

It's definitely gameplay. I've learned to limit my exposure to politics and gameplay, else it'll drive you insane and depressed.

I think it's more than gameplay somehow, but I'm tired of it. I am tired of trying to walk the thin line of neutrality when one side is trying to push me into an abyss.

In fairness, most of them don't see you as a neutral party any longer. And I'm sure the other side wouldn't be pleased with you describing them as "an abyss".

But I do understand what you mean. There's plenty of people that put gameplay and politics above all else in NS, even decency.

It was imperialism that originally attracted me to NationStates, the abyss for me is being thrown into gameplay politics beyond the pale without a choice - things that I never want to have to be involved in.

Choice is important for me. I was given a choice, and I made the one I believed was right.

My neutrality - not going any raider orgs or defender orgs, never deploying on 3rd party missions etc - was hard for me. It meant that my WA would be effectively locked into Osiris and that I'd be on the outside of major networks simply to ensure that I wasn't used as a tool by either side.

I came to the role of MoFA in Osiris after we had a MoFA who held the same role in TNP at the same time and done nothing in the role, putting TNP first. I saw how much their UDL role blinded them to anything which didn't fit on their narrow-minded view of "right and wrong". and I also got a first glimpse at the utter politically corrupt morass that was the UDL.

I've also experienced LemonLove/Jakker and GV in turn so I'm not just displeased with defenders.

I'm stick of it all truthfully.

I've chosen the side that I felt was best for Osiris in the long term, and I know Osiris better than 99% of the people who are being vocal against it. I was Foreign Minister for eight months - few people hold a role as long as I did in the region, any region, especially a GCR.

I'm looking forward to when all of this is over, so I can retire peacefully, hopefully with permanent citizenship - something I had originally before it was removed when the Kemetic Republic was dissolved.

I didn't see your last post, but we've already discussed all this in private anyway.

So how was everyone's New Year's Eve? Tomorrow my holidays end, but frankly, I'm glad they do because I'm beginning to get a little bored... and the fact it keeps raining doesn't really help

Mine was alright! I spent some of it working on Wintreath, and some playing games. Most people at work have to go back tomorrow, but I took two more vacation days so I don't have to go back until Monday. Then another 11 months without taking any further vacation days so I can do it again next year.

-REDACTED-

I'm rather upset of not getting the promotion, and instead it going to Govindia, someone who joined after me, but he seems nice, so I'm glad that he got promoted. Besides there's always next time...right?

Not to mention the fact he's far more experienced than I am.

So... I've finally accepted that I am Medically Unable to serve in the United States Military. :/

Rather disappointing, actually.

Don't be too hard on yourself. When China invades, they'll be enlisting the dead. You'll be a shoe in for sure.